Let go of your emotional clutter. Who are you? Do you know your true purpose and passion?

courtesy of Pixtawan Free digital photos.net

courtesy of Pixtawan Free digital photos.net

How many times have you said yes to a commitment when you really wanted to say no? When we oblige unwillingly, we feel the energy literally drain away from us. Often resentment follows and a negative exchange with others. What do our yes’s stand for if we can’t say no when we mean it? I became a woman who did too much, just trying to please everyone and squeeze that one more yes into my life to receive approval.  As a mother this has been incredibly hard to change.  Feeling at the beck and call of my children and giving 110% left me feeling unfulfilled and feeling like my time was never my own. Several years ago I almost lost my driving licence as I drove faster and faster, cramming everything into my day and not wanting to be late for deadlines.  I racked up 12 points for speeding and it was a wake up call to slow down to the tune I was playing and take some time out to work out who and what I am.

One night I woke up in the middle of the dark feeling the grip of anxiety, feeling burdened and burnt out. I felt overwhelmed with stuff to do and places to be and people who needed me.  My life felt chaotic and without purpose.  I begun the process of reflection which led me to write down and list all my childhood acheivements, the books I had read, the amazing places that I visited and all the life skills that I had learnt.  I counted over 20 years of dedication to personal growth and lastly I catalogued all the jobs I had been given and courses that I had attended. Suddenly the question came to me “so what does this mean?” Yes I am multi-skilled and yes I have lived a colourful life but I am still without my purpose, my passion to call my own and make a difference. So I went back over my writings and decided in that moment that I wanted to encompass all that I had learnt to help others. I made a conscious shift to reduce the time I spent doing things I didn’t enjoy. I re-evaluated my time, de-junking unnecessary commitments.  It was painful in parts, letting go of the old life.  I had spent a long time thinking that the life I was living was fulfilling but actually it was burdening me.  One day someone said to me “I don’t know how you do all that you do”.  At that time, I had horses, chickens, dogs, running a home single handed and trying to survive a divorce.  I thought about the answer to that question and it was  “I do it in a permanent state of overdrive robotic routine and often suffering from stress”.  The crunch point came when my youngest daughter asked me to look at a picture that she had drawn and I said I didn’t have a minute to look at it. It was a sad realisation. Interestingly the next day I was passed a book from my EFT practioner which gave me the courage to follow my heart and pursue my true purpose. I owe this first step to Corrina Gordon- Barnes of You Inspire Me and her book Turn your passion to profit.  I felt so inspired by this book that I signed up to her accountability course of the same name.  Due to unforseen cirucumstances I was unable to actively finish the course but as a believer in fate, I embraced this.  A year on, I can now say that from this new fresh approach to developing my passion to Unclutter your life, I feel liberated. I am finally doing what I love and I have made space for things that matter.

 

 

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